I Wish People Knew… a mother shares her thoughts on adoption

Illus: Luciana Navarro Powell BABIES COME FROM AIRPORTS Kane Miller Books

A Mother’s Response

I wish people knew that the love in your heart is no different whether your family member is adopted or biological.

My mom secretly confided after my child arrived via the airport, that she had been afraid that she wouldn’t love her adopted grandchild as much as her other bio grandchildren.

Within seconds of getting off the airplane she had her new grandchild in her arms beginning a relationship that is still extremely close. And she proudly confided that she was relieved to say that she loves them all the same!!

I wish people would not use the term “real” when asking about my child’s birth family or when asking if I am the “real” mom.*

I wish people would understand that you don’t have to look alike to be a family and not all adopted children want the fact that they may look different from other family members to be the main topic of conversation.  Honestly, I don’t even think about the fact that my child doesn’t look like me.

Many thanks to today’s guest contributor, Kathy, who contacted me after reading Hannah’s post last week. 

*Another mom wrote to say her preferred phrases are

  1. family formed through adoption
  2. birth parents, (mom or dad)
  3. life parents, though there are many other good phrases out there.

She added, “I can’t stand [the terms] real parents, blood sibling or blood parents. My 2 cents!”

If you are a parent, child, or sibling of adoption interested in sharing your thoughts, use the contact form on my web site or leave a message in the comments below. Here’s a link to the first post in this series which explains the details.  

Stop by next week for a guest post from Taylor. 

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